Responsibility is rewarded to managers as they grow. Whether we feel like it or not, more and more self-reflection is required as more scrutiny is placed upon the behavioral expectations that are silently laid upon us. The store manager’s scandal doesn’t get in the national news, the corporate executive’s does. For a more successful and less stressful career, there are behaviors that you must commit to making standard or unacceptable within yourself.
Obviously, behaviors like larceny, harassment, and other forms of abuse are not acceptable. To have those as your boundary only makes you legal. You want to be exceptional. Those boundaries are external. Your behavior should show that your personal boundaries would never allow you to come close to those things.
Setting internal boundaries takes confronting your past self and determining to be different. I struggle with this in that I tend to reflect and see only the negative, which brings on guilt, and then I let the guilt sit there and bring me down. Don’t get me wrong, initial guilt is healthy because it is an internal indicator that your moral compass is working properly. Guilt has its purpose and time, but it should not become a state of being; it should propel us into action or self-control not to repeat the actions that led to the guilt.
There is a gray area before your actions cross into the place where peoples’ opinion of you and your job may be affected. Your goal should be to avoid this area. You will never win the approval of everyone, but you are free to navigate your career in a path that does show everyone that you have the best intentions, and the skill to back it up. Your actions, and what you say, will determine others’ opinion of you.
It is impossible to be happy and unflustered all the time. If that is your impression of some people, then you may want to reflect upon your view of humanity and how you think other people live their lives. Everyone has their struggles, from rich to poor, newborn to a hundred, fast-food to Musk. People are people, and we must treat them as such. Good behavior must stem from a foundational belief and understanding that everyone around us matters.
This is a good time to pause and truly ask yourself if you hold this belief. I have to come back to this basic question often. “Am I treating people like people?” It’s an easy question, but it uncovers realities and feelings that we may be tempted to avoid. When we work with people we don’t see everyday, it becomes easy to objectify them. To avoid tendencies toward tyranny, we must have compassion for the humanity and respect for the dignity of everyone around us.
Next we must understand and accept that we have an effect on people and the environment around us. Management comes with several elements of power. We have the power to make decisions that affect our company, our workspace, and the careers of the employees around us. These are the obvious areas where our decisions show themselves. The power that we may forget about is that which we hold over the mood and general outlook of the people around us. We must reflect and contemplate how our words and attitude change the workplace.
A trap that I must often fight off is cynicism. I often find myself expecting the worst of people as a way of being prepared for potentially bad situations. Herein lies the danger of pessimism masquerading as “being realistic.” While it is healthy to have contingency plans, voicing skepticism or doubts about fellow coworkers has an unconscious effect that brings the morale of the workplace down. There are times to share concerns about employees with your boss, but a constant barrage of your negative opinion of any subordinates may cause a change in your boss or their opinion of you.
How do we get better at addressing our issues and concerns? We must refuse to allow our personal outlooks or feelings to dictate how we treat individuals. We may completely expect a certain employee to do something wrong or that we don’t agree with. At this point, it is the perfect time to step back and look at the whole situation. The first question should be internal, “Why do I not like the actions of this employee?” “What have I done to curb the behavior?” “Is the behavior worth curbing?” Those are the questions that will set you up to understand the situation and make decisions on how to go forward and how to speak about the situation and that employee.
The personal responsibility you take for your behavior is a critical factor of the impression others have of you. Are you admitting mistakes and fixing them? Are you throwing your coworkers “under the bus” when you face adversity? Are you protecting your team when needed? Are you giving your subordinates tasks that you simply don’t want to do? Are you delegating uncomfortable situations? These behaviors are noticed and remembered by those around you. Your behaviors should show that you are open to growing and learning and are actively working for the benefit of those around you.
Honesty is rewarded. I have experienced this more than I can remember. It may not feel like it at the time. It even got me fired once, but my next job was with a better company and it led more quickly to a much better position than I would ever have had with the previous company. The behaviors that companies encourage should not induce that guilt or anxiety when we contemplate our actions. They should reward truth and show their understanding of the humanity of the employees. If you are having trouble navigating your current company while holding to your commitment to integrity, then you may want to look for another company. Your behavior is yours to own, to control, and to take pride in because of your consistency and integrity.